'Tis the Season

This Christmas season I have had a hard time getting into the "Christmas spirit". I think there are a couple of reasons; the biggest one being that we have not shopped at all. This has made me a bit grumpy and in all honesty, I have not looked forward to anything that has to do with Christmas. 

On Thursday, my Mimi died.  She was sick for many years and finally drew her last breath last week. That night I had to run some errands.  Jolly Christmas music played on the radio and I felt resentment well up in me. Resentment that we are in a tough season, resentment that my grandmother suffered for so long, resentment that life was not going the way I wanted.

And then it hit me....like a ton of bricks.

Oh come, Oh come, Emmanuel
And ransom captive Israel
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear

Rejoice, Rejoice!
Emmanuel shall come to thee, Oh Israel!

Oh come, Thou Dayspring, come and cheer
Thy people with Thine advent here;
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night
And death's dark shadows put to flight

Rejoice, Rejoice!
Emmanuel shall come to thee, Oh Israel!

Oh come, Thou rod of Jesse, free
Thine own from Satan's tyranny
From depths of hell Thy people save
And give them victory o'ver the grave

Rejoice, Rejoice!
Emmanuel shall come to thee, Oh Israel!
Rejoice, Rejoice!
Emmanuel shall come to thee, Oh Israel!

Emmanuel- "God is with us". The Reason for Christmas. With out Him where would I be? I would be in lost world without grace, peace or Spirit. I would be hopeless in my own circumstances.  I realized that I have felt hopeless over these last few weeks but that is not because of God but because of me! I have looked to my own abilities and I have suffered because of it.

When people would ask how to pray for Mimi I would tell them to "pray she finds Jesus". That is what I wanted for her more than any physical healing or physical peace I wanted her to have spiritual healing and peace.  I am not sure if she found that. I know that the last several months of her life people were able to minister to her and she asked for her Bible.  I know that when she prayed a simple prayer for my father it was answered and she was so excited that she had "witnessed a miracle".  I believe that God gives everyone a chance to turn to Him.  Why wouldn't He? He sent His precious Son, Emmanuel, to ransom our souls! 

I will miss you, Mimi, but hold onto the Hope of the Lord that I will see you again in Glory.