Our move is getting closer and closer. I am getting excited and scared all at the same time. A weird mixture of emotions. There have been some costs that we have to endure in order to move and I am really getting worried!
I know. Worry is believing God can't do it but I can't help but feel that right at this moment. I know that I will be blogging about how He put it all together soon, but for now I ask for prayers! :)
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Thursday, June 28, 2012
All Circumstances
The bible commands us to "Give thanks in all circumstances" 1 Thess 5:18. I remember teaching this one to Jackson when we first started homeschooling. He was struggling with school and life in general. There were a few verses that we learned in that time and this was one.
When I was pregnant with Char I took a bible study about thanksgiving. It was a hard time in my life. I was so sick and I could find little to be thankful for.
Let me tell you this. Nothing that the Lord teaches us is in vain. He will teach you and make you use it. Sometimes more than you would want! :)
Last week I started feeling badly. I was dizzy and nauseous...just weird-feeling. Eventually, I went to the ER to be checked out just in case. The diagnosis was vertigo and the doctor was not really quite sure why I was having the problem. According to WEBMD, anxiety and stress can be causes of vertigo. I am leaning towards that as the reason.
Last week I told you that I let it go. I was casting all my cares upon the Lord. I truly believe I did. There have been moments that I have started to worry but I have been quick to give it back. So why am I suffering with all of this? I think that sometimes our bodies still can physically react to stress even if we are not feeling it mentally.
Today the vertigo came back. I was so sick to my stomach and I just knew I would pass out.
We are moving in 8 days! That is right, 8 days! I have not even begun to pack. I am working 2 jobs! I am homeschooling my kids and today I received an email from my academic counselor that my leave of absence from school is OVER and I will be starting in 11 days!!!! So, 3 days after I move I will need to start school. I am a little panicky about that! I am not ready.
So as I sat down at the computer tonight I started to think about all that was going on. House. School. Jobs. Kids. Friends. Life. And I realized that God has put me right here. This moment. This is what He has chosen for me. For that I give thanks. I am thanking Him in all of my circumstances.
And the dizziness is gone.............
When I was pregnant with Char I took a bible study about thanksgiving. It was a hard time in my life. I was so sick and I could find little to be thankful for.
Let me tell you this. Nothing that the Lord teaches us is in vain. He will teach you and make you use it. Sometimes more than you would want! :)
Last week I started feeling badly. I was dizzy and nauseous...just weird-feeling. Eventually, I went to the ER to be checked out just in case. The diagnosis was vertigo and the doctor was not really quite sure why I was having the problem. According to WEBMD, anxiety and stress can be causes of vertigo. I am leaning towards that as the reason.
Last week I told you that I let it go. I was casting all my cares upon the Lord. I truly believe I did. There have been moments that I have started to worry but I have been quick to give it back. So why am I suffering with all of this? I think that sometimes our bodies still can physically react to stress even if we are not feeling it mentally.
Today the vertigo came back. I was so sick to my stomach and I just knew I would pass out.
We are moving in 8 days! That is right, 8 days! I have not even begun to pack. I am working 2 jobs! I am homeschooling my kids and today I received an email from my academic counselor that my leave of absence from school is OVER and I will be starting in 11 days!!!! So, 3 days after I move I will need to start school. I am a little panicky about that! I am not ready.
So as I sat down at the computer tonight I started to think about all that was going on. House. School. Jobs. Kids. Friends. Life. And I realized that God has put me right here. This moment. This is what He has chosen for me. For that I give thanks. I am thanking Him in all of my circumstances.
And the dizziness is gone.............
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Provision
This week has already been full!
It's Tuesday.
As soon as I moved out of His way, the Lord started moving. He goes fast! (if you have been reading my blog for a while you will know that for me to say this is so ironic!)
Like I said in my last post we are moving. San Felipe here we come!! It is about 20 minutes from where we live now. It is 4 bedrooms and on 2.5 acres. I am a little nervous. We have not made a house payment in over a year and honestly paying rent is a little nerve racking! But we have done the math over and over and the Lord assures me it can be done.
Troy and I have been trying to figure out a way to stay in this house for free. We keep getting told by others that we have plenty of time. That is simply not true. The clock hand is ticking and our time on Goldstone Drive is short. God is clear....we cannot stay here anymore. It is time to let it go.
One of the ways is by giving me another job! I know, you are thinking 'you already have a job'. Yes, I do. I have been working as the Assistant Director/Music and Drama Teacher at The Creator's Kids for the last 7 months. I still work there! My hours are only part time right now because, well, we are a new business! We are growing and my hours are beginning to pick up. But in the meantime I have another job. It is part time and at our church. The amount of money that I will make there will almost pay for our new rent!!! Can you believe that? God so has this!!
I get the keys on Friday and start packing in the meantime. We aren't moving for at least another 2-3 weeks. I hope to post some pictures of the new house soon!
It's Tuesday.
As soon as I moved out of His way, the Lord started moving. He goes fast! (if you have been reading my blog for a while you will know that for me to say this is so ironic!)
Like I said in my last post we are moving. San Felipe here we come!! It is about 20 minutes from where we live now. It is 4 bedrooms and on 2.5 acres. I am a little nervous. We have not made a house payment in over a year and honestly paying rent is a little nerve racking! But we have done the math over and over and the Lord assures me it can be done.
Troy and I have been trying to figure out a way to stay in this house for free. We keep getting told by others that we have plenty of time. That is simply not true. The clock hand is ticking and our time on Goldstone Drive is short. God is clear....we cannot stay here anymore. It is time to let it go.
One of the ways is by giving me another job! I know, you are thinking 'you already have a job'. Yes, I do. I have been working as the Assistant Director/Music and Drama Teacher at The Creator's Kids for the last 7 months. I still work there! My hours are only part time right now because, well, we are a new business! We are growing and my hours are beginning to pick up. But in the meantime I have another job. It is part time and at our church. The amount of money that I will make there will almost pay for our new rent!!! Can you believe that? God so has this!!
I get the keys on Friday and start packing in the meantime. We aren't moving for at least another 2-3 weeks. I hope to post some pictures of the new house soon!
Sunday, June 24, 2012
It's Official
We are moving. We are about 98% sure we know where; just not when. God is moving we know this for sure. We are just waiting patiently on Him. I had meltdown yesterday when I began to think about the move.
1. I don't want to leave my house. I like it here. We bought this house because we chose it; not cause we were desperate.
2. I don't like someone else dictating when I have to leave.
3. I don't want Troy to be looking for jobs in areas outside of Katy or even Texas!!!!
4. I don't want to count other's opinions more than my own. But I do.
That last one is not about the move but it is something that is affecting me too. Yesterday was a whirlwind. It is amazing how the enemy will use whatever he can to get a hold of you. I have been doing so well and he used something I totally did not expect to put me in a tailspin that I was not able to get out of.
But as the psalmist says, "The Lord gives us new mercies every morning" today is a new day. I can't wait to spend it with fellow believers. I can't wait to hear the Word of God from the pulpit and to participate in corporate worship.
As I finish I leave you with this picture. Ellie being baptized. Heaven rejoices and so do I. This is what matters!
1. I don't want to leave my house. I like it here. We bought this house because we chose it; not cause we were desperate.
2. I don't like someone else dictating when I have to leave.
3. I don't want Troy to be looking for jobs in areas outside of Katy or even Texas!!!!
4. I don't want to count other's opinions more than my own. But I do.
That last one is not about the move but it is something that is affecting me too. Yesterday was a whirlwind. It is amazing how the enemy will use whatever he can to get a hold of you. I have been doing so well and he used something I totally did not expect to put me in a tailspin that I was not able to get out of.
But as the psalmist says, "The Lord gives us new mercies every morning" today is a new day. I can't wait to spend it with fellow believers. I can't wait to hear the Word of God from the pulpit and to participate in corporate worship.
As I finish I leave you with this picture. Ellie being baptized. Heaven rejoices and so do I. This is what matters!
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Clinging to the Cross
Last week we sang the old hymn "The Old Rugged Cross". I remember day that we would pull out our hymnals and go through the motion singing this song. It was boring and there were a lot of versus. Now at a church that sings these old hymns in a more contemporary way I have found them to be a bit more interesting.
Back to last week. On Sunday we sang this song and it had a totally different meaning to me. Like I said before I was breaking. I literally could not bare anymore. This song spoke to me. I felt the Holy Spirit whispering, "Just cling to the cross". That is what I have done all week. Anytime my mind wonders and I find myself in an unhealthy thinking pattern this song pops in my head.
Thank you, Lord. Thank you for that old rugged cross that I can cling to and can find comfort in! You have won. There is victory in it.
Back to last week. On Sunday we sang this song and it had a totally different meaning to me. Like I said before I was breaking. I literally could not bare anymore. This song spoke to me. I felt the Holy Spirit whispering, "Just cling to the cross". That is what I have done all week. Anytime my mind wonders and I find myself in an unhealthy thinking pattern this song pops in my head.
Thank you, Lord. Thank you for that old rugged cross that I can cling to and can find comfort in! You have won. There is victory in it.
- On a hill far away stood an old rugged cross,
The emblem of suff’ring and shame;
And I love that old cross where the dearest and best
For a world of lost sinners was slain.- Refrain:
So I’ll cherish the old rugged cross,
Till my trophies at last I lay down;
I will cling to the old rugged cross,
And exchange it some day for a crown.
- Refrain:
- Oh, that old rugged cross, so despised by the world,
Has a wondrous attraction for me;
For the dear Lamb of God left His glory above
To bear it to dark Calvary. - In that old rugged cross, stained with blood so divine,
A wondrous beauty I see,
For ’twas on that old cross Jesus suffered and died,
To pardon and sanctify me. - To the old rugged cross I will ever be true;
Its shame and reproach gladly bear;
Then He’ll call me some day to my home far away,
Where His glory forever I’ll share.
Friday, June 15, 2012
God Clothes Us...........
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry
about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what
you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than
clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If
that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and
tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you
of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
Matthew 6:25-34
Yesterday we had a little ding-dong-ditch at our home. My children (and I) were incredibly blessed by a good samaritan. I know who it was...but I also know they want to remain nameless..this is what I love about them. They give without ever wanting glory. The give because they are obedient to the Lord. You see, the other day Troy was mentioning to a friend how the kids have outgrown their clothes. He mentioned that I was headed to the local thrift store to try to find something for them. (BTW I found a few things but was not very successful. Although I did happen upon shoes for both Ellie and Jackson and that was much needed). This family heard the need and provided in a huge way.
My girls were so excited! The even did a fashion show. I would love to post pics and may do that later today. So thank you to the family that did that for us. You are a blessing to us but more importantly I know you will be blessed because of your obedience.
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Timing
We all know that God's timing is impeccable but I have to just say it again!
WOW!!!
My post the other day was me letting go. I typed out all of that and in that moment I let it all go. I cast all my cares upon Him. Not an hour after I posted it I got a call. It was a friend that I have not seen in a while. She asked if she could stop by a minute. Of course! (My house was a mess but she has been here before and the rule is I only clean for you once...then you get to see the real me!). So she showed up and she sat down and began to tell me about a family home that has been sitting empty. She had made some calls and she wanted to know if we would be interested in staying there til we could get back on our feet.
WHAT?!?!?! Seriously?!?!?!?
I didn't cry...yet! We asked about rent and the price was exactly what Troy and I have talked about (when talking about a reasonable budget). Then I cried. I knew that the Lord knew what we could afford and that He was going to provide that for us. We went to go and look at the home. On the way there I prayed thanking God for an option. This is the way we are looking at this.
We looked at the house. It needs work. The kind that Troy and I can do and with a Lowe's discount; cheaply. By the end, our potential landlord had lowered the rent by 50% if we would help with some projects around the house.
Troy and I were in shock. We left with a promise to pray about it and then to get back to her. We don't know what God has in store. A couple of friends have offered to help pack and even help move. All things we may need. I just don't know if it is time, yet. Like I said; we are going to wait for the Lord to move us. We are going to wait for His perfect timing. What I do know is that if that house is where we should be then "it will be there when we get there". A little line that Troy always says and something the Lord said to me. There are so many other factors going on now. We honestly can't make a decision yet.
God is working. I know He is. He provided an envelope of cash for us yesterday. Right when we needed pull-ups, gas and kitty litter. You know the important stuff! It may sound trivial to you but God cares about those things and He shows us that with His timing!
WOW!!!
My post the other day was me letting go. I typed out all of that and in that moment I let it all go. I cast all my cares upon Him. Not an hour after I posted it I got a call. It was a friend that I have not seen in a while. She asked if she could stop by a minute. Of course! (My house was a mess but she has been here before and the rule is I only clean for you once...then you get to see the real me!). So she showed up and she sat down and began to tell me about a family home that has been sitting empty. She had made some calls and she wanted to know if we would be interested in staying there til we could get back on our feet.
WHAT?!?!?! Seriously?!?!?!?
I didn't cry...yet! We asked about rent and the price was exactly what Troy and I have talked about (when talking about a reasonable budget). Then I cried. I knew that the Lord knew what we could afford and that He was going to provide that for us. We went to go and look at the home. On the way there I prayed thanking God for an option. This is the way we are looking at this.
*I have spent too many months trying to manipulate scenarios into God's plan. The littlest thing would happen and I would think 'This is God. I know it is. It will work'. Not everything in life is God's will. So I couldn't go back to that. I couldn't assume this was God's will. But what I did know is that this was not coincidence. God was showing me that we had options.
We looked at the house. It needs work. The kind that Troy and I can do and with a Lowe's discount; cheaply. By the end, our potential landlord had lowered the rent by 50% if we would help with some projects around the house.
Troy and I were in shock. We left with a promise to pray about it and then to get back to her. We don't know what God has in store. A couple of friends have offered to help pack and even help move. All things we may need. I just don't know if it is time, yet. Like I said; we are going to wait for the Lord to move us. We are going to wait for His perfect timing. What I do know is that if that house is where we should be then "it will be there when we get there". A little line that Troy always says and something the Lord said to me. There are so many other factors going on now. We honestly can't make a decision yet.
God is working. I know He is. He provided an envelope of cash for us yesterday. Right when we needed pull-ups, gas and kitty litter. You know the important stuff! It may sound trivial to you but God cares about those things and He shows us that with His timing!
Monday, June 11, 2012
Finding Bottom
Wow! That is all I can say. It has been months since I have posted and so much has happened. I struggle to know if I should share the events one-by-one or just give you glimpses. Too be honest there are so many things that I may bore you with a 10 page post.
This blog was set up as a way for me to share the journey of my faith-walk. I think I will just start there.
We have been struggling financially and I have really tried hard to change that. I have worked countless hours, I have fought with my husband to look for another job, I have sold items in my home, I have looked for another home, I have manipulated, I have even resorted to asking the government for help. It has been utterly exhausting. The burden is heavy. I cannot continue to carry it any longer.
A dear friend of mine told me that I was going to have to hit bottom before I would be able to give all of that up. Really hand it over to God. So many times we say that we are giving something to the Lord and we take it back. We don't trust Him. We think that He can't do it or that we can do it better.
"Just let me handle this" we say.
So for the last year this is what I have done. I have given it over and I have taken it back. God isn't fast enough for me. Just tell me the plan. He is taking too long. I know what is best!!!
The Lord loves me and He is slow to anger, I know because His Word says so. Instead of striking me down He began to make life uncomfortable. He began to take away things that I cherish most. He changed relationships that I cherished. He took away more and more income. Finally, He took away my home. The last thing on the list. He took it.
I have found the bottom. I cannot go any lower. The weight of all of those things is so heavy that I may just break...wait...I am broken.
The Lord is strong, He is wise and He is good. He broke me and immediately gave me a hand. He met me where I was. He said, "you may not have trusted Me, but I still love you". He showed me that I had been looking to others for answers and not Him. I had been looking to others to help me and support me and not Him. All the while He was there. He was waiting with open arms. Ready to take the load off of my shoulders and carry the burden for me.
I have literally cried for two days. There are many reasons. One: I am so overwhelmed by the graciousness of my father. Two: life is still happening and now I know that I really can't control it! Three: There is a big chapter in my life that I know is coming to a close. This saddens me. I will admit I am resistant to change!
In a nutshell that is it! I know there is more that I can say but that is what I feel led to share today! Hope you all will find some encouragement in this today.
This blog was set up as a way for me to share the journey of my faith-walk. I think I will just start there.
We have been struggling financially and I have really tried hard to change that. I have worked countless hours, I have fought with my husband to look for another job, I have sold items in my home, I have looked for another home, I have manipulated, I have even resorted to asking the government for help. It has been utterly exhausting. The burden is heavy. I cannot continue to carry it any longer.
A dear friend of mine told me that I was going to have to hit bottom before I would be able to give all of that up. Really hand it over to God. So many times we say that we are giving something to the Lord and we take it back. We don't trust Him. We think that He can't do it or that we can do it better.
"Just let me handle this" we say.
So for the last year this is what I have done. I have given it over and I have taken it back. God isn't fast enough for me. Just tell me the plan. He is taking too long. I know what is best!!!
The Lord loves me and He is slow to anger, I know because His Word says so. Instead of striking me down He began to make life uncomfortable. He began to take away things that I cherish most. He changed relationships that I cherished. He took away more and more income. Finally, He took away my home. The last thing on the list. He took it.
I have found the bottom. I cannot go any lower. The weight of all of those things is so heavy that I may just break...wait...I am broken.
The Lord is strong, He is wise and He is good. He broke me and immediately gave me a hand. He met me where I was. He said, "you may not have trusted Me, but I still love you". He showed me that I had been looking to others for answers and not Him. I had been looking to others to help me and support me and not Him. All the while He was there. He was waiting with open arms. Ready to take the load off of my shoulders and carry the burden for me.
I have literally cried for two days. There are many reasons. One: I am so overwhelmed by the graciousness of my father. Two: life is still happening and now I know that I really can't control it! Three: There is a big chapter in my life that I know is coming to a close. This saddens me. I will admit I am resistant to change!
In a nutshell that is it! I know there is more that I can say but that is what I feel led to share today! Hope you all will find some encouragement in this today.
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