I don't want to learn a lesson today!

These last few weeks the Lord has really been dealing with my heart.  It has taken weeks because I keep going back to my old ways. 


Yesterday I was very irritated with our ABF, only because God was putting my issues right in front of me!  I hate that!  I really wish He would just free me of myself and let me go about life.  Alas, that is not how it works.  I know in the end I will be a better servant for Him, but now I am just not in the mood to learn this lesson. Not today.

Today the words "I have no mercy for you." came out of my mouth.  As soon as I said it I was appalled at my own self.  Surely, I would not want to be treated that way.  Yet I chose to treat someone else that way.  Someone that I love so dearly that I would give my life for. 

I immediately thought of how Jesus loves me the same way.  How He did give His life for me.  How He shows me NEW MERCIES every day! And today. I could not. I would not. Immediately I knew I should repent.  But those same old heart issues are there.  Now I know why the Lord is working on me. 

I will recount the steadfast love of the LORD, the praises of the LORD, according to all that the LORD has granted us, and the great goodness to the house of Israel that he has granted them according to his compassion, according to the abundance of his steadfast love.
Isaiah 63:6-8